I know it’s a cliché but I have been wooed by a Frenchman called Sebastian. He called into
the yard the other day, while Neil was laying on the floor at home with a slipped disc, and
showed me a whole box of tricks and it’s safe to say, I am in love and I want to shout it from the
roof top.
At first I was sceptical of Sebastian and his box of tricks but what caught my attention was a
PVC number he pulled from his box. Here, I thought, is something to get excited about and
something that could make me feel good and comfortable through February and March. I know
for some of you, your mind will have gone straight to the gutter so before you raise an eyebrow,
let me go back a step and explain. It starts with Dryrobes. The Marmite of outerwear.
I don’t want to offend anyone so let me just say that Marmite is the one thing that as a coeliac I
am grateful that I cannot eat. I will also say that with a Dryrobe, if you use it for its intended purpose, for getting warm and dry when emerging from the sea, then it’s brilliant. I will even confess that for a moment one evening last summer I wondered if I should buy one and shall explain the context.
A friend loaned me hers so that Neil and I could sit on their boat with them and have a quick drink after I had indulged in a wakeboarding session. I had purchased a new board and was so excited to try it out that it was the only thing I took out on the boat with me. That evening I forgot everything including my shortie wetsuit and towel (I’m putting this down to enthusiasm but could easily have been down to my age and depleting hormone levels) so I had to ski in my shorts and vest. It was a really late evening tide and the conditions were perfect. No other speed boats out to chop up the water and no wind so it was glass. I feel a little giddy just remembering how perfect it was. I had a great ski on the new board and it was only when we stopped because it was too dark to be safe that I realised how quickly the temperature was dropping and Neil and I agreed we would have to hot foot it back to the quay with me
ducked below the tubes of the RIB to try and stay warm. When our friends whistled and called us over had it not been for that Dryrobe I wouldn’t have stayed for a drink as I would have caught a chill for sure, and while I know chills are not life threatening like they are in any of the Bronte or Austen gothic novels, it’s no fun trying to hold a conversation when you can’t stop your teeth from chattering.
So, as I sat toasty warm in the cockpit, enjoying a G&T and laughing with friends we don’t see nearly enough, I did catch myself thinking that I probably need a Dryrobe. However, when I stood up and had a job bunching the robe up to climb over the cockpit rails, the impracticalities of wearing such a big and cumbersome item of clothing on a sailing boat became evident. It wouldn’t work for me as I’d end up getting hooked up on a cleat or winch. No, I decided, I’ve managed this long with just a towel and selecting the right clothes to change into after a ski that I would be fine without. Anyway, nothing warms me quicker than that struggle to get my damp body back into my clothes while trying to keep myself wrapped up in my towel to maintain my modesty. So, in short, the Dryrobe is not for me.
But I would like something to keep me warm and dry on dog walks and Auntie Rach can see the
appeal of Dryrobes when she’s standing beside the football and rugby pitch watching her boys
play but she, like me, hates that they have all the shape and finesse of a bin bag. Actually, the
bin bag would probably be a nicer fit. Neil has suggested I get something from Guy Cotton and while I get that they are 100% waterproof, I don’t want to wear a bright yellow smock that is not lined and so not warm . Also, like the Dryrobe, the cut is functional and while they are great for fishermen and sailors, as a
woman in my forties, while I am walking my dogs, I want something that is warm, waterproof but
also a nice cut and an inconspicuous colour.
This brings me right back to Sebastian and his box of tricks. The PVC number he pulled out and
showed Rach and me was an olive green, hooded ladies coat. It falls mid thigh, has glued and
taped seams, black zips, reinforced hood so that it sits nicely around your face when up but the
most glorious thing about this coat is that it has a faux fur lining so sumptuous that mink would
be jealous. Honestly, it’s so soft it makes my mouth water. I loved it. Auntie Rach loved it (See video and picture as evidence).
‘Ah,’ Zac said, ‘It’s 100% waterproof so that means it’s not breathable. You’ll get really hot and
sweaty.’
He was right. Or was he? I want a dog walking coat. I walk the dogs on the marsh most
evenings and I walk them for no less than twenty minutes and never longer than an hour. It’s six
degrees outside at the moment so how hot would I get on my average dog walk that would
make this coat unsuitable? I’d use this coat if it was a northerly or easterly wind (100%
waterproof and non breathable also means 100% windproof) because as my granddad used to
say, those are lazy winds – they don’t go round you, they go through you – and I’d use this new
coat if it was cold and raining. The rest of the time I’d be happy with my old down-filled coat or,
in the spring, my little rain mac.
“What about mud splatters though?” I said to Rach after convincing Zac that as I wasn’t
planning on using this coat for hard manual labour, just a moderate evening dog walk, it would
actually work for me, “My dogs are a nightmare. They love water and mud and then running
really close to me and coating me with mud and dirty water. I won’t be able to put that through
the washing machine.”
Rach looked pained as she has this problem too with her dogs and as she and I looked back at
the coat hanging in front of us we both had the eureka moment.
“It’s wipe clean!’ we said in unison as Rach ran her hand over the heavy duty fabric, the colour
of which would hide most of what mud didn’t automatically fall off the coat.
That was it.
“Do not put that back in your box Sebastian. Neil would like to buy that for me for Valentines,” I
said.
I tried it out on Monday evening. I walked the dogs before heading to the gym so was in my
leggings and thin longsleeved top and didn’t think about how it was three degrees out and
blowing a north easterly so had a wind chill factor of about minus forty – at least that’s how it felt
on my hands, the rest of me was warm. Not toasty hot, I definitely could have done with another
layer to achieve toasty status but when I think of how thin and light my gym wear was and that I
was able to walk the dogs for twenty minutes in that wind and the only thing to freeze was my
hand that was holding the torch, that’s bloody good. I can’t wait to try it out in a good downpour.
I think that will make me feel really smug.
I cannot recommend this coat highly enough and would happily order you one as we are the
official Guy Cotton stockist. It’s called the Charleston and comes in olive green or grey and costs £210
Just to balance this blog out, for the male dog walker and sailors, we also have some great Guy
Cotten lightweight sailing jackets that Sebastian talked us through which would be great for a
Valentines treat or gift. I would tell you more about them but I confess I wasn’t listening to
Sebastian as I was too busy imagining myself out on the marsh in my new coat and then
thinking of all the ladies I know who would love this coat too. You can look at our range of the men’s Guy Cotton outerwear here
For any farmers who might be reading this, as Guy Cotton stockists we are also able to get the
agricultural workwear that is used on many livestock and poultry farms. Neil and I are proud to support local businesses and are offering a special trade discount to any fisherman and farmers who order any Guy Cotton items from us so please email me if you would like me to send you a catalogue and price list.
Many of you really like our logo and we have a new online shop where you can buy your official
NTB rugby tops, sweatshirts and hats and caps. You can select to collect from the yard or to
have us post items out to you. The sailing Guy Cotten wet weather gear can be ordered via our
online shop too and the new items can be ordered now and will be with us for collection or
delivery within five working days – unless otherwise specified on the website. The shop web address is shop.neilthompsonboats.co.uk
Happy Valentines/February everyone. If you see me out on the marsh looking warm and snug
and pleased with myself on a rainy day, that will be down to the love I’m feeling for my new Guy Cotton Charlestson Coat.
